joseph

there was this girl. isn’t that how the story of every man’s downfall begins? except this.. this wasn’t your ordinary girl. she would say she was, but. no.. not ordinary. not her. she was a dream. she was brought up right, loved the Lord, came from a good family… and her heart. phew! man!

and we were getting married. i couldn’t believe she said “yes”! i was beside myself. smiling like an idiot all the time. the right girl can do that to you. and i found her.

so… you can probably imagine how hard i fell when i found out she was pregnant. and i knew.. we were waiting, you know? so i knew it wasn’t mine.

i felt like i was kicked in the gut. you hear people talk about being devastated but this was.. i was spiraling. this was my downfall. what would our friends say? Our parents? what about our reputation?

i was gonna break it off. wouldn’t you?

but this un-ordinary girl, was carrying an extraordinary child. this was.. it’s hard to grasp even now.. this was God’s son. and He wanted me to stay. and be the child’s father.

a son. every guy wants a son. but my son. i wanted my son. this was not mine! this was not what i wanted.

i was gonna be a father. but not his father? what am i being asked to do? play along with what? what was this?

i thought i was going to have this awesome wife and i was going to build us a house and we’d have our own kids and we’d be living the life! but it turned into this whole thing that’s… not about me. and i can’t do anything about it.

but i can do something about it.

God wants me to stay. i can stay. and He wants me to be a father to His son. i can be the boy’s father.

the perfect life with a wife and kids and a house – it wouldn’t work anyway if God’s not in it. all of that takes backseat to Him and His son. our son. i can put what He wants me to do at the top. that goes first. that’s what i can do about it.

i choose His way.

my name is joseph
and i am second